Wait. What??

There are so many thing that I need to learn about this new road. So many moving parts and surprises that I never had to think about before. The latest is health insurance and life insurance, along with all of the other budget items that are necessary and important.

Health insurance is something that many of us take for granted while we are married, especially if we are not the employed spouse and need to rely on the employed spouse for coverage in the partnership. Something you really don’t think about until you really have to, oddly enough. You tend to take it for granted, and expect it to always be there.

I was referred to a health insurance counselor – how many more people do we need to get involved in this debacle before we are done?! –  and she pointed out some very astounding numbers and ideas with regards to my health insurance. There are so many scenarios!

He can decide to keep me on until the new year, or until the “open enrollment period” of November-January, or he can totally cut me loose at any given time. Of course, it all depends upon his company and what they allow, but in the end, he is holding the reins on this horse isn’t he? He has control over my health future.

Then there is the issue of life insurance. I’ve already mentioned the last conversation, where I sat in the room while everyone around me quibbled over whether or not I actually NEEDED life insurance, and at what cost. Now that I’ve had that conversation with a professional, I feel that I should have a policy, but there is a new wrinkle in that plan. It was suggested that I choose a beneficiary – who could that be, if not my ex-spouse?? My parents are obviously much older than I am (no kidding!), making the possibility of them out-living me a slim chance, so who do I choose? Someone fiscally responsible, who will protect the future of our kids in mind.

I was told, I should think of someone that will keep their best interest in mind when they inherit thousands of dollars, someone who will invest it in their best interest and help them pay for college or other life changing/deciding moments. I asked if I could choose our oldest son who is already 18. The answer is “yes” but I need to feel that he is mature enough and will handle the responsibility of thousands of dollars for his brothers and himself well. Will he blow it all at the riverboat casinos? Or trick out his classic car?

I truly think he was born “mature” but you never can tell when money is involved.

Then the reality hit, I was told I should write a letter to each son explaining my intentions for their inheritance. The consultant put it as “last letters” to the people of importance to you after your death. This will help them make better, more responsible decisions with the money you leave them.

Wow. Really? How do you write a letter to your child with the idea that you are no longer there? And how do you direct them to spend it wisely from the grave? What do you write? Will it be with a Darth Vader type of voice or Mother Nature?

Her suggestion? Write it alone, have a box of Kleenex and give yourself time.

Like I don’t have enough reasons to have a good cry already. I think I’ll hold off on the life insurance for a bit and just focus on keeping the health insurance for now, less tears.

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